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Friday, June 12, 2009

What not to say to your pregnant coworker...

Today is the last day in the office for many of my friends who are being laid off in the first round of cutbacks that will eventually result in the closure of our facility. I'm not feeling very funny today, so I'd like to give a big thanks to CBeth for helping me come up with today's Friday Funny...what not to say to your pregnant coworker! Given that I work in the male dominated field of engineering, I have a laundry list of one liners that I imagine will make you cringe...not only are some of these guys single and/or without children, some of them aren't the most socially adept in the first place {{ahem}}. Here are a few of my "favorites" from this pregnancy and my pregnancy with Sweetpea.

*Are you SURE that you're not having twins? Really?*

*Wow Steph, are you going to fit through my door much longer?*

*You're really starting to waddle!*

*Don't worry, if you go into labor here I can deliver the baby, I used to be an EMT, you know*
{{This guy was creepy and I didn't even know him - no way this is going to happen, buddy!}}

*So you had a rough first few months, huh? I could tell you felt like crap!*
{{gee, thanks!}}

*You're coming along...nicely*

*So are you freaked out that you're pregnant and about to lose your job? What are you going to do?*

*multiple horror stories regarding their wives giving birth, including one whose wife broke her pelvis during delivery - yikes!*

Isn't it funny how people seem to come up and just say anything to a pregnant woman? What funny stories do you have along these lines? I'd love to hear them, I could us a laugh today!

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Jen said...

How about "Remember- you are only suppose to be eating for two!"

Loved that one.

Krys said...

In the last couple weeks of my pregnancy, I had several people tell me "Oh my god, you're HUGE!!". *I* was not huge. I was carrying ALL the baby weight right where I was supposed to be carrying it - in my uterus. Apparently, that part of me looked huge.

Brooke said...

I had a co-worker honestly say to me "Oh my gosh, you are HUGE!" And when I responded "Um, that's not really something you should say to a pregnant woman" he then said "Oh, I thought was a good compliment....means your progressing well". Gee, thanks.

Lori said...

I started laughing hysterically with your "You're coming along nicely" one. That's freaky! I had people say that to me, too! Like they were monitoring me for some masterplan...

trinlayk said...

When I worked in an office,years ago, one of the gals was pregnant with her first child...

One woman with 5 kids already was telling her all kinds of horror stories about labor and complications.

I wanted to KILL that woman... and kept telling new mom to be that everything would be OK.
"I was only in labor for 8 hrs, and delivery was a breeze. It's not horrible."

Carrie said...

The woman whose cubicle faced mine used to greet me with "Are you STILL here?" starting like, 2 months before my due date. Hard to come up with new ways to say, "Why would I not be still here? I'm only 3x weeks." And I never even carry that big.
Many women will hate me but I am now getting tired of everyone -- mainly other moms -- telling me how tiny I look and expecting me to take it as a compliment. I dunno, I'd kinda like to look REALLY impressively pregnant at least in the last month even though I'm glad that, say, my car seatbelt still fits well.

Monica said...

Can I just say, seriously? Unbelieveable.